Tuesday, 5 January 2010

Mark Mobius digs commodities

Yes, he does. Well, he says he does. Mark Mobius is the man behind the Templeton Asian Growth fund, and he likes commodities. Well, so Reuters reckons - see this shit.

But what else does Mr Mobius like? Is there something he wasn't willing to tell Reuters, but is willing to tell me?

I speak to Mark, and Mark speaks to me. We have a connection. A rare, mystical connection. No journalist can get as close to these people as I can. There ain't no journalist who can open up his or her mind at this time in the morning and just send out a message, a message that flows on the astral plane: Mr Mobius speak to me!

You can call me Mark, man. I was calling you Mark, man. But I like calling you Mr Mobius as well. I gotta lot of respect for people like you. You ain't no commie son of a bitch, am I right? You ain't wrong. Mark, my friend, what didn't you tell Reuters? I didn't tell them about the burning love inside. I fucking knew it! Tell my readers about the burning love, man. Tell them how much you dig it. Are they reading this? They will be, once I've cleaned it up a bit. Taken out some of your foul language. Mikey, you can talk! Come on, Mark. Let's hear all about how you love the burning love. Mike, I love to love, but my baby just loves to dance. Who's your baby, man? Metatron. Metatron? Sounds like a fucking robot. No, he's an angel. A top angel. Never heard of him. He's all right. A good sort. He comes to me when I most need him. He enters me - nothing sordid, of course - and he fills me with the burning love of money, and, more often than not, passes on a bit of, er, info. Info? Yeah. He's the one who told me about the pork and beef situation in China. Interesting. I've never heard of this angel. Don't you ever have any dealings with Big Herb or Ganesh the elephant god? I mean, these guys are actually money gods. I can only use them for certain things, Mike. But I've built up a special relationship with this Metatron dude. Take a look at the Talmud. Sure, I'll do that.

Well, dear reader, you learn something new every day, don't you?