Tuesday, 13 September 2016

Barry Schanker has gone to Man Group!

Well, well ... / Yeah, he's got a new job. [Well done, Barry, son!] He was at SkyBridge Capital. Now he's not. He wanted a new challenge. Of course, a real challenge would have been joining the financial shamans at GLG. But he chose the computer squares at Man. 'Oh.' And it's his life, you know? I'm not too upset about it.

So ... Mr Schanker is the head of US wealth sales in New York. On his LinkedIn profile, he claims to be ... a driven relationship builder with a history of success. 'Is that true, boss?' Yes, Voice, it is. Apparently, our Barry is like the Cilla Black of the financial world. He's always putting couples together, arranging blind dates and that. And he won't accept a penny! The man has a heart of gold.


Let's move on, my friend(s). [I'm just not in the mood for finance. It's still summer, ain't it? Christ! I know exactly how the Aviva Investors mob feel. I mean, why bother? Why push yourself? Life is too short. / Reader(s), somewhere there's a Cornetto with your name on it ...]

Sales, sales, sales ... / Yeah, sales. Every sale is the same. You get on the line, right at the beginning, and you go to the end. It's a beautiful thing. 'Don't forget the dotted lines, above and below, boss.' I haven't forgotten the dotted lines, above and below, man. They're important. Take yesterday. I was doing fine - with The Straight Line adapted to my own purposes, you dig? 'Yeah.' I did my blogging, played a bit of guitar, even got a lyrical idea. Everything was going well. Then at about nine o'clock ... I stopped for the day and ate a tube of Pringles. 'Well, what's wrong with that?!' I should have kept going until bedtime. 'Jesus! You're crazy!' But it's okay, Voice. I didn't go off to Pluto. I was within the boundaries.

Obviously, the last paragraph will mean nothing to the Aviva Investors boys and girls. You've got to envy them, I suppose.


I need some new strings for my acoustic guitar. I reckon those Yamaha FS50BT strings last about a hundred hours. They cost £16. They were £15 before Brexit. 'Christ!' Not that we've had Brexit yet. When we do have it, I'm sure the strings will cost £20 or more. But that's what the people voted for, higher prices of imported goods. Is there anything we don't import these days?

Ah, that's it. Laters.