Thursday, 14 January 2016

Alexandre Rahmatollahi has been elected to the partnership of Palamon Capital Partners

Yes, dear reader(s), it's the Thursday night PR email, back by popular demand. Well, this Alexandre has done all right for himself, ain't he? 'Ali, boss.' What, Voice? 'They call him Ali.' Oh, of course. Yes, Alex has done very well. 'Ali, Ali, Ali!!!' Yes, Ali.

Ali Rahmatollahi. Are you happy now?! Apparently, he's half Swiss, and half Persian. He sounds like a confused kid. / Let me quote from the email -

Louis Elson, managing partner of Palamon Capital Partners, said: "On behalf of all of the partners of Palamon, we warmly welcome Ali to our partnership. This has been a tremendously successful year for Palamon which included the completion of three transactions worth almost €400 million in highly compelling growth companies across Europe. Ali played an instrumental role in each of those transactions reflecting the additional market reach he has brought to Palamon. We are proud that our time-tested programme of attracting kooks from other industries to learn private equity investing the Palamon way has yielded another talented new partner for our firm."

Bloody hell! They love him! And notice - "kooks". A good sign! 'Louis didn't say mystic kooks, boss, did he?' Oh, come on, Voice! In this business, we only have mystic kooks. / No, it's a very good sign. And I'm sure Ali's emotional confusion will pass in time. It's obviously a form of shaman's sickness. There's nothing to worry about.

A picture of Ali is available upon request. No thanks! 'Ha!' Why would I want a photo of the man?!


Anyway, that's enough. Good night.