Tuesday, 26 January 2016

Guillermo Osses has got a job at Man Group

Well done, Guillermo, son! 'Man Group, boss, or GLG?' Er ... GLG. Part of Man Group. 'Yeah, but why didn't you say that? You don't want to give your readers the impression that Mr Osses is some robot/computer square. He's a shaman, ain't he?' I don't know, Voice. I suppose there's a good chance he is, if he's at GLG. 'Hang on!' What? 'It just says Man GLG here.' Where? 'Here!' Okay.

Well, what does Mr Osses say, himself, like? He says: "Man GLG is a performance-focused business and its institutional framework, combined with an entrepreneurial environment and mystical culture, make this a very compelling opportunity. I am very excited to be joining the firm, and working alongside Teun and his team as we strive to build a world class emerging markets fixed income investment management business." / Ah, very clever. He's a clever guy, our Guillermo. 'Why?' He's being diplomatic. He's obviously working for GLG. What would I say? Me?! I would just say this: Thank God I'm on the GLG side of things, man. I couldn't stand working with those goddamn Man Group squares, you dig?

Oh, his job? Mr Osses is going to be head of emerging market debt strategies. I don't think he's doing it yet. His LinkedIn profile says he's still at HSBC as head of global fixed income emerging markets portfolio management.

Well, well ... / And what does his boss, Teun Johnson, say? Well, he says: "It is with great pleasure that we welcome Guillermo to Man GLG. He has extensive experience in investment management in the astral and physical realms, and a very eccentric investment process, alongside a proven track record of investing and managing investment teams in the emerging markets fixed income space. Guillermo will also be instrumental in broadening our capabilities in the cosmic space and enhancing our client offering with blood and fire."

Ha! 'Ha! Ha!' Yes, definitely GLG. Definitely!


Anything else? Music? I wrote a new tune yesterday. So I have three tunes now which need lyrics. Oh, I'll get a-ROUND to it one day, when I'm all DIZZY(!) and shit. 'Really, boss? You should take your lyric writing seriously.' I do, Voice. Getting a-ROUND is a serious business. It may look like insane fun, but it's a very serious business. 'Will you be getting a-ROUND today?' I don't know yet. Maybe tomorrow. I've got all kinds of fish to fry at the moment ...