Monday 23 March 2020

Drive-through Covid-19 testing facility

Yeah. Set up by Unilabs. It's a PR email.

Geneva, 19 March 2020: Unilabs, the leading European diagnostic services provider, has set up a "drive-through" facility to collect samples from suspected Covid-19 patients. The facility, among the first of its kind in Europe, is based in Porto, Portugal. 

Okay. I wish we knew how many people had this thing. It would be nice if the mortality rate was really, really low. Of course, that would be no comfort to the people who are badly ill with it. I'm just saying, that's all.

"The opening of this temporary drive-through facility allows us to serve the urgent needs of our community, and takes the pressure off hospitals struggling with the flood of patients requiring sample collection and analysis," said Luis Menezes, CEO of Unilabs Portugal. "The key benefit is safety."

After making an appointment, patients drive to the collection point, where they roll down their windows to be tested by trained medical staff in protective clothing. By remaining in their own vehicles throughout, patients minimize contact with other people, reducing the risk of infection for everyone - patients, medical professionals, and the general public. The system allows about 400 daily tests to be performed in the first phase, rising to nearly 700 tests over the coming days. The facility is being kept safe by local law enforcement.

The big problem is medical staff getting the virus.

"Thank you to Porto City Council and the Northern Health Administration for their combined efforts to help make this innovative collection site possible," said Luis Menezes.

Unilabs currently performs Covid-19 testing in Switzerland, Sweden, the Netherlands, Portugal, Slovakia, and Czechia. As well as drive-through facilities, Unilabs is also working on home testing kits. Both solutions will be rolled out across the group as soon as Unilabs is authorised to start testing by local authorities.

Right. Okay.

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Anything else? I don't know. I reckon the PR emails might start drying up a bit now. Everyone is stopping everything.

I don't want to write about coronavirus all the time, man. Maybe I'll retreat into a fantasy world. What else is new?!

Obviously, I'll be doing a conceptual after lunch.

Listen! I couldn't believe the number of people going out at the weekend. On Saturday, I thought I might walk to Richmond and back, but decided against it. I didn't want police officers giving me dirty looks for being out and about and not being a responsible citizen. You know? But then I saw news stories of people just crowding into Richmond Park and having picnics and shit. Are they crazy?! Just because the pubs are shut it doesn't mean ... ah, never mind. I hope these cretins don't learn the hard way.

If everyone stayed indoors for a month ...

Imagine.

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I'm trying to be positive. There is one good thing: I've stopped eating takeaways, and started cooking. Simple meals, sure. I'm not Marco Pierre White. But it's healthier, ain't it?

Oh, I'm officially in "beast mode" now. So, you've been warned, kook(s)! Not as bad as our Dan though.