'Again?!' Yeah, seriously. He seems a bit confused though. 'Ha! Boss, Carson Block is totally confused. He's always talking about starting a hedge fund, but he'll never do it.' No, Voice. He will do it. And soon. He's serious this time. However, that's not the confusion in his mind, his soul. 'Oh. What's the confusion, then?' Well, I tried speaking to him about his plans. I phoned him yesterday. But I couldn't get any sense out of him. 'I told you! He'll never do it!' He will, man. Carson will start a hedge fund. It's just ... 'What?!' Okay, okay. Voice, reader(s), you'll have to judge for yourselves ...
From our phone conversation yesterday: 'Mikey, I've never felt this good, son! (Great! I guess you're excited about the hedge fund, yeah?) Hedge fund? No, forget that. I'm the hoochie coochie man. (Eh?) The gypsy woman told my mother ... before I was born ... you got a boy child's comin' ... gonna be a son of a gun ... he's gonna make pretty womens ... jump and - (Carson, mate, what are you going on about?) I'm the hoochie coochie man. (Well, er ... what's that got to do with starting a hedge fund?) Nothing. Listen, Mikey, you're the one who's always saying finance is for squares. I got the blues, man! (Yeah, but -) I got a black bone. (Yeah?) I got a mojo, too. (Oh.) I got the John the Conqueror root. I'm gonna mess with you. (No, please.) Come on, Mikey! Play the game. (No. Christ! Can't you tell me anything about the fund? My readers will want to know. They're serious people, Carson.) But you know I'm him. (Who?!) Everybody knows I'm him! I been all round the world. I was born for good luck. Well, you know ... I'm the hoochie coochie man. Everybody knows!'
I put the phone down after that. Unbelievable! / So, dear reader(s), I'm afraid there's nothing I can tell you about Carson's future hedge fund. 'Ha!' I know it seems unlikely at the moment, but I'm sure he'll get his shit together. Once he's got the blues out of his system ...
From our phone conversation yesterday: 'Mikey, I've never felt this good, son! (Great! I guess you're excited about the hedge fund, yeah?) Hedge fund? No, forget that. I'm the hoochie coochie man. (Eh?) The gypsy woman told my mother ... before I was born ... you got a boy child's comin' ... gonna be a son of a gun ... he's gonna make pretty womens ... jump and - (Carson, mate, what are you going on about?) I'm the hoochie coochie man. (Well, er ... what's that got to do with starting a hedge fund?) Nothing. Listen, Mikey, you're the one who's always saying finance is for squares. I got the blues, man! (Yeah, but -) I got a black bone. (Yeah?) I got a mojo, too. (Oh.) I got the John the Conqueror root. I'm gonna mess with you. (No, please.) Come on, Mikey! Play the game. (No. Christ! Can't you tell me anything about the fund? My readers will want to know. They're serious people, Carson.) But you know I'm him. (Who?!) Everybody knows I'm him! I been all round the world. I was born for good luck. Well, you know ... I'm the hoochie coochie man. Everybody knows!'
I put the phone down after that. Unbelievable! / So, dear reader(s), I'm afraid there's nothing I can tell you about Carson's future hedge fund. 'Ha!' I know it seems unlikely at the moment, but I'm sure he'll get his shit together. Once he's got the blues out of his system ...
