Monday, 9 March 2015

Who on earth is Sam Cosh at F&C?!

Well, he's some guy, a fund manager, who works at F&C. And he's a clever guy, too. He's clever enough to just put F&C on his LinkedIn profile. Because you see there's a problem. I always thought it was F&C Asset Management. 'It is, boss.' No, Voice, I've seen it called F&C Investments now. 'Two different firms, man.' No, they're the same, man. And you get this with Jupiter. I've seen it called all kinds of things. 'Sam's got that F&C Investments logo on his profile.' Yeah, I know. But he's only put F&C at the top. Sam Cosh, director, European equities at F&C. 'Does it matter?' Probably not. I don't know. I just like things to be clear and simple. 'You're easily confused, ain't ya, boss?' Yes, I am.

And we haven't even started with who on earth Sam Cosh actually is, dear reader(s)! 'Yes, we have. He's a fund manager at F&C.' Oh, is that all, Voice? Can you just dismiss a man with, He's a fund manager at F&C - ?! 'You can with this sort. They're only finance workers, Mikey. There's no mystery. No romance or poetry. I thought you knew that.' Well, well ... / Well ... I'll say one thing, I hope our Sam doesn't have anyone working under him. 'Why not?' Think about it for a minute. [More than fifteen minutes have passed, dear reader(s). You can't get the staff these days.] 'Oh, oh ... because they'll be working under the cosh!' Yes. 'You're really funny, you are, boss. You should be on the telly with that stuff.' Thank you, Voice.

Ha! 'What?' Ha! 'What, man?!' Mr Cosh, our Sam, was at Barings Bank for a while. 'When?' 2003 to 2004. 'Oh. After the bank collapsed. Another one. Amazing!' He was there for ten months. 'That's not too bad. A few are there for ten years before they realize the truth.' Yeah. Christ. Why they keep falling for the scam though I'll never know. 'They're not as bright as they're made out to be.' Maybe. / Someone's having a massive laugh at their expense, that's for sure.

[Hang on! I've found something on Fundweb about Sam and his, er ... "team". 'Oh dear.' He does have people working under him. 'Poor bastards!']

Ah, this is interesting! 'What?' Our Sam got his first job at KFC in Wimbledon, frying chicken and that. He started at the bottom, man! He got his hands dirty! A true working class hero! 'No. It's his school, boss. A private school. You've read it wrong.' Oh, yeah ... my mistake, Voice. / Well, he's frying different fish now ...