Monday, 29 February 2016

The Collins Alternative Solutions fund has been shut ...

Yes, uh, yes ... Collins Capital, over in America, has shut its Collins Alternative Solutions fund. It was a mutual fund that offered hedge fund strategies to retail investors. 'Was it a fund of hedge hedges fund funds of fund, boss?' I wouldn't like to say, Voice. I'm not an expert on dreary finance, as you know. 'No.' Ask me one about the astral plane. 'Er ... okay. When we die, will we all meet again on the astral plane?' Ha! You're already dead, my friend. 'Oh. Ha! Yeah, maybe I've never been born!' He said, he said ... 'What?!' Never mind.

Collins Capital? More information?! Give me a moment ... / I may as well tell everyone - YOU(!) ... Collins Capital is based in Florida. [Over in America somewhere.] And for two decades, Collins Capital has specialized in managing diversified multi-manager, multi-strategy portfolios of hedge funds that target low correlation to the markets and to other alternative and traditional investments. 'Nice!' Yes, it is. I'm just hoping that they have other funds. 'Of course they do, boss! Don't be so negative.'

[No more information. Thank God! Is that it? 'Good night.' Good morning!]

Uh ... negative?! Me? Well, it is Monday morning. I reserve the right to be negative on a Monday morning, you dig? 'Oh dear.' Well, well ... I don't know. I just don't know. 'COME ON!!! MORE!!! PLEASE!!!' / Er ... I won't be writing all day, reader(s), kook(s), spinner(s). No big conceptuals or anything, BECAUSE(!) ... I received a couple of tunes yesterday, fragments, from the cosmos, which I'm hoping I can put together today and turn into a song. 'So you are going to be writing then? Music, man.' There's no rest for the wicked, Voice. / I only got four and a half hours sleep last night. 'Christ!' Psychologically, I just can't stand sleeping any more. I used to love it in the old days. 'Old days?' The golden years of my youth. One big holiday! Now it's just work, work, work ... WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!


Anything else? No. / Well, the European Union? Oh, screw politics, man. Seriously! But have you seen the Tories who want out? Iain Duncan Smith, Chris Grayling, Priti Patel, Michael Gove. It's like the cast of a horror film. 'Priti Patel looks all right, Mikey.' Ha! Fenella Fielding looked all right, son!!!