Monday 7 October 2013

Who is Philip Nell?

Good question! I'm glad you asked me. 'They didn't ask you, boss.' But I'm gonna tell them! So shut up, Voice, please. / Mr Nell is some sort of crazy property trust European retail funds real estate LUNATIC - let's be honest - who works for Aviva Investors. 'Like they haven't got enough problems, Mikey.' Yeah. (I don't know.) / I've been looking at his LinkedIn shit. Did you know that Philip was a founder of the portfolio sales team at Jones Lang Wootton (now Jones Lang LaSalle)? 'No, I didn't know that, boss. That's really fascinating, that is.' All right, Voice, don't take the piss. 'It's a bit early in the week, and the day, for all this, ain't it?' / Well, let me just finish with the news that our Phil reckons that prime property in London is crap now. 'He said that, did he?' Words like it. He said words like it. Phil doesn't mess about, man. He says what's on his mind.

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Yeah, it is too early. / I pity the poor slags who have to go into work on a cold, misty Monday morning and write about finance ... the whole day long. 'Fucking mugs, Mikey, eh?' Well, I wouldn't want to do it. I don't even get warmed up till Wednesday.

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I know I'm always changing my mind about music, but I think I've worked out what the eight greatest songs ever written are. 'Why eight?!' / Just eight, man:

1) Mack the Knife
2) My Funny Valentine
3) Night and Day
4) Summertime
5) Imagine
6) Yesterday
7) Something
8) By The Time I Get To Phoenix

They're all songs for crooners, except Imagine.

...

 'You didn't put your own songs on the list, boss!!!' Oh, that would be arrogant, son. I couldn't do that!

My songs. / I'm going to record You're Lying and My Heart at the end of the week ... probably. They need a bit more rehearsing.