Tuesday, 1 July 2014

Solomon Kumin is getting ready to launch a billion dollar hedge fund

Or so "they" say. (Ha!) I'm not sure I believe "them" because Solomon's hedge fund doesn't even have a name yet. My number one rule is: Never trust a hedge fund that doesn't have a name. I mean, it's hard enough to make a living with a fund that does have a name. So, until Solomon comes out and tells everyone what the name is, I'm going to consider it no more than pie in the sky. It may be a very nice pie flying high in the friendly sky (as Marvin would say - if he was with us) but it's still just a pie ... in the sky, you dig?

Now, I know a lot of you like extra details. (They give you a sense of reality, don't they?) Well, I can tell you that this Solomon Kumin character used to be chief operating officer at SAC Capital Advisors. And he must miss the old place because his LinkedIn profile says he's still working there. 'Sad, Mikey.' Oh, come on, Voice, be generous. Some people can't let go, you know. Solomon is obviously a sentimental man. Not everyone is as heartless as you are. 'If I'm heartless, boss, it's only because I don't have a body. How many more times?!' All right, Voice, I'm sorry. I forget sometimes. You have so much vitality. You're so full of life. I expect you to have a heart, and a nose, and ears, and legs, and ... you know? 'Yeah. I had all that stuff. In the old days.' (Really?) Ah, the old days ...

None of us are getting any younger. Christ. I hope Solomon makes a go of this hedge fund of his. You only get one life.


Guitar? Well, dear reader(s), let me tell you ... I seriously believe it's only a matter of time before I'm like Eric Clapton. 'Bullshit!' No, man. Examine the evidence. I started to learn alternate picking LAST FRIDAY!!! ... and I can do it already! 'So?' Alternate picking is bloody difficult, man. Down, up, down, up, down, up ... all over the fretboard. It ain't easy.

It can be done. Anything can be done. (You gotta believe!) I've set myself a standard. I did it with my songwriting. I'm doing it with my guitar playing. NO PRISONERS!!!