Thursday, 5 February 2015

Michael Spencer and Chris McCoy are suspended!

Yeah, these two JPMorgan "chase me" guys are suspended. Something to do with their expenses, client-related stuff. It doesn't seem fair. I mean, if your client wants to go out for a drink, a meal, a lap dance or something, what are you supposed to say? No, sorry, man, the bosses won't let me have any fun. Let's stay in and watch TV. I'll make you a coffee. 'That's ridiculous, Mikey! JPMorgan won't have any clients left at this rate.' I know, Voice, it's mental. / I'm looking at their LinkedIn profiles. Michael Spencer is head of FX hedge fund sales, and Chris McCoy is executive director of macro hedge fund sales. They seem like decent guys, you know? 'Yeah.' Mickey went to City University, and Chris went to Surrey University (of all places), so ... they're not Oxbridge wankers, do you know what I mean? / I just hope JPMorgan comes to its senses and lets the guys get back to work. 'If JPMorgan is worried about expenses, maybe Mickey and Chris can give the lap dances themselves.' No, I don't think so, Voice. (It doesn't bear thinking about, does it?)


Hedge funds, hedge funds, hedge funds ... / Other news? Oh, the Tories are being bankrolled by hedge funds. Surprise, surprise, eh? It makes me laugh when these Conservative nutjobs go on about Labour being funded by the unions. So what, man?! The money comes from millions of honest, hard-working people. What's wrong with that? / Now, you know I love hedge funds, dear reader(s). I spend a good part of my week writing about them, for Christ's sake! However, do we want hedge funds running the country? 'No!' No. We do fucking not!

Rant over. / Music? I'm listening to 1999 again. It is a pretty great album, maybe as good as Purple Rain. Maybe ...

Lunch? Cheese and pickle ... 'Soup?' Sandwich! Who has ever heard of cheese and pickle soup? / Crisps as well. Yoghurt. And a can of Coke. I haven't given up the Coke yet. I'm addicted. 'Maybe that's the problem with the expenses.' Shut up, you idiot!