Thursday, 25 October 2018

Gold, baked beans, Tesla ...

Gold, well ... / Actually, let's start with Tesla, dear reader(s), because it's exciting news. Tesla stock went up 13 percent on Tuesday. It fell 2 percent yesterday. But today! ... it's up another 10 percent, roughly, in, you know, uh, after hours, pre-market trading, or whatever it is. 'Wow, boss! Wow! But why?' Well, Tesla seems to be making a profit now. 'Okay, boss. That's good.' Yes, yes, BUT(!) ... the exciting news is ... 'Go on!' ... a short seller has changed his mind about Tesla and gone long. 'Who?!' Andrew Left of Citron Research, Voice. And I should imagine the readers already know. 'Oh. I'm an idiot, me.' Ha! Yes. I'm still fond of you though.

This is what Andrew Left said: "Plain and simple - Tesla is destroying the competition. Tesla is not just pulling customers from BMW and Mercedes but also from Toyota and Honda. Like a magic trick, while everyone is focused on Elon smoking weed, he is quietly smoking the whole automotive industry."

Now, what have I been saying all year? 'Er ... that you and Elon Musk are the reincarnation of Julius Caesar.' Ha, ha! Not quite, man. 'Well, it's something along those lines. You wrote a couple of posts about it.' Yeah, yeah. Christ! Listen to me! Don't ever bet against Elon Musk! 'Okay. I won't.' Good!

Okay, okay. Gold ... !!!

First time buyers are rushing to purchase physical gold as stock market falls stoke fears of a full-blown economic crisis. The Pure Gold Company has seen a 347% increase in people purchasing physical gold bars and coins during October (compared to the monthly average over the last three years), with almost three-quarters buying gold for the first time.

Jesus! And I can't even afford gold, can I? 'Get the baked beans, boss!' Yes, I'm going to.

CEO Josh Saul said: "Over a third of these buyers work in financial services like banking, insurance or financial research and they're very worried the global equity decline may be just the tip of the iceberg. Others are clearly worried too because the gold price has increased by over 6% from its lowest point in October as investors ditch their equities and currency investments for the safety and security that gold provides in uncertain times."

Okay, okay. Thanks, Josh! / No endorsements, obviously, dear reader(s). 'Ha! They're on their own.' Of course they are! Can you imagine me giving out investment advice?


Anything else? Yes ... 'Tell them!' Have a nice weekend, crocodile(s)! 'Bye, alligator(s)!' Later(s)!