Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Nexar hedge fund!

Bankers are leaving Societe Generale in droves! Why, O Master? Because they have started up their own hedge fund! Nexar! Can you dig it? O Master, this is so groovy. Fuckin' A! You see, they were sick, just sick, thinking about their bonuses being cut. Now they don't have to worry. Of course they don't. They can make all the money they want with their new hedge fund. Brilliant!

Yes. Arie Assayag is the chief executive, and get this - Eric Attias is the chief investment officer! Oh, not Eric - another one of your mates! O Master, how do you know all these people? I meet them in the desert of our dreams, silly. Yeah. Stupid question.

I have been speaking to Eric. This is what he told me: 'Michael, you know I despise communist scum. You know I will never allow anyone to take my money away from me. And the people at Aquiline Capital Partners feel the same way. They are bankrolling us - with burning money straight from the desert! This is going to be a mystical operation. The communists? They won't even be able to find us. How will these godless arseholes get their hands on our money if we are off floating in a world beyond their meagre experience, beyond their comprehension?'

Eric, you're the man!