Monday, 14 September 2009

Why did Jamie MacLeod leave Skandia Investment Group?

That's what everyone wants to know. Why did Jamie leave? And where is he now? Mr MacLeod was the chief executive of Skandia Investment Group, but he left last week - in a mysterious way! Suddenly, without telling a soul.

O Master, my guess is we will never hear from him again. He's gone underground. He's done a runner, with all the money!

O my child, don't be so melodramatic. It's nothing like that. He has gone into the desert to find the cosmos within and without himself.

Oh. And I suppose he spake unto your mind, yeah?

O my child, what do you think? I get all the scoops, me.

THIS IS WHAT HE SAID, (I PICKED THIS SHIT UP WITH MY SUPER-CONSCIOUSNESS): 'O Mikey, O great one, Master of all the financial shamans, listen to my golden voice as I send it to you on the waves of the cosmos. I am in the desert. I had to get away. Good luck to Nils Bolmstrand. He will need it. But I am free now. Free to be myself, my true self, a greater self. More than human! I intend to forget all about fund management. I ain't never going back to that life. I have found something that tastes much sweeter - the mystic life! The love of Big Herb, the caresses of dead financiers, the wondrous trunk of Ganesh, the burning inside, the stars at night in the desert sky, and the stars in my head when I close my eyes! Yes! Yes! Yes! The cosmos is within me!'

O Master, Jamie has found the cosmos within him! That's pretty rare, isn't it?

Yeah. Beginner's luck.

By the way, Jamie doesn't seem to understand that fund management and the mystic life are not mutually exclusive, but never mind.