Thursday 6 November 2014

David Einhorn is fed up

Yeah, you know, dear reader(s), the Greenlight guy. 'Of course they know, man!' He's fed up! 'Well, it happens to the best of them.' Maybe he'll retire soon. Or he might just need a holiday. What do I know? / Anyway, Mr Einhorn said in a conference call: "Er ... yeah, we were well-positioned to be opportunistic in early October, believe it or not. We added to our net-long ... thing, er, exposure, during the correction, which ... unfortunately was brief. It was, er ... a frustrating quarter, yeah, as a ... lack of winners, for fuck's sake, combined with ... a normal amount of individual losers, uh, led to losses from our long, short ... and our macro positions. Oh, nothing terrible happened! We just got ground down, gradually, yeah? I'm actually very depressed. All this work, the hours ... I mean, if I had a hobby - like Michael Fowke, you know, that shaman guy? He plays his guitar when he's not blogging. Something like that would be all right. But ... I just can't relax! I get this itch right in the middle of my back. And my eyes keep shaking. Well, no, it's not my eyes. No, I mean, it's the eyelids. They keep twitching. For hours sometimes. It's a nervous thing, I suppose. And the itch, the twitching ... I'm feeling pretty rundown."

Oh dear. 'He's in a bad way, boss.' In the old days I would have told Dave to go into the desert for a break. 'He was never interested in the mystical stuff.' I know, Voice. / I don't know what to suggest. Er ... I'm going to the pub tomorrow. That's always good for me after a hard week's work.

...

Oh, before I go ... there's some wretched fireworks display going off in the distance that sounds like artillery fire. / I don't need it. And I don't want it! Stupid traditions in this country, I tell you.