Wednesday, 9 September 2015

John Chatfeild-Roberts ain't gonna be no chief investment officer no more

I presume you're familiar with John Chatfeild-Roberts, dear reader(s), the CIO at Jupiter? I still don't know who he is, really. But - 'Just his name, boss.' Yes, Voice. And that's why he's stepping down from the CIO position. 'To concentrate on the Merlin portfolio range.' Shut up, man! That's the excuse they're using at Jupiter. The fact is, you can't have such a character as CIO with a sinister "e" before the "i". 'Oh, of course.' It upsets the clients.

Now, imagine in a perfect world: John Chatfield-Roberts. What would that be like? 'Boss, with a name like that, Johnny boy would be chief executive in no time.' Yes. Christ. I hope he's reading this. And I hope he has the good sense to make the change. 'He's only hurting himself.' He's stubborn, Voice. Masochistic or something, I don't know. / And don't get me started on all this Merlin shit! 'No!' Merlin was an arsehole!

On a more positive note, my dear friend Stephen Pearson is to become the new chief investment officer at Jupiter. 'Yippee!' Well done, Stephen, mate!


Anything else? 'Music?' Ha! I didn't even try to record my songs on Sunday. I didn't even change my strings. 'Oh dear.' Never mind. I've got to be in the right mood, you dig? 'Maybe this Sunday coming, Mikey, yeah?' I live in hope.

'Lunch?' A cheese sandwich. And you'll be glad to hear, dear reader(s), that I'll be having a mug of tea with it instead of the normal can of Coke. 'Great!' I'm getting healthy!

Music? 'Er ...' Oh, I'm listening to a cool Gilbert O'Sullivan song, We Will. I've had his Berry Vest of ... collection for a quite a while now, but I've only just "discovered" this song.

There are loads of hidden gems on albums. For example, I didn't pay much attention to Bob Dylan's The Man in Me (from New Morning) until I saw The Big Lebowski.

Anyway, laters, yeah?