Tuesday 1 September 2015

Man Group's Li Yifei has been taken into custody!

Yes, dear reader(s), I've been reading the South China Morning Post again. 'What?! You read that, boss?!' Voice, I need to know what's going on in the world. The whole world, you dig? China, too.

I don't think it's anything to worry about. The police just want to question Li Yifei about market volatility. 'Oh.' Our Li, or ... our Yifei(?), is the chairwoman of Man Group's China unit. 'Nice.' Hopefully, she'll be okay.

Apparently, certain characters in China have been spreading rumours. 'Oh dear.' Obviously, the authorities don't like it. Close to two hundred people have been punished. 'For what? For distributing pirate copies of a Fleetwood Mac album? That's outrageous!' Eh? Fleetwood Mac aren't involved. 'Rumours, boss.' Rumours? Yes, rumours about the stock market. 'Right. Okay.' You're an idiot!

What an idiot! / Anyway, I'm not sure the Chinese understand hedge funds and how they work. 'They probably think hedge funds are evil.' You reckon?

...

Well, well ... / But what do we care, dear reader(s)? It doesn't affect us, does it? 'Have you got any readers in China, boss?' A few, I think. I get a visit every now and then. 'How do they get past the firewall?' I don't know. Maybe it doesn't stop them. My readers are, er ... "special". 'Special?' High up, yeah? 'Oh. / How come you know so many people in high places, boss?' It's my charm, man, and great wisdom.

...

Anything else? Music? I haven't got anything on yet. 'Fleetwood Mac?' No! Shut up! You're obsessed! I'm not in the mood for them.

Er ... as I'm free for the rest of the day I might try playing my guitar for eight hours, maybe more. Ten hours! To see what happens. 'Ha! You'll wreck your hands, Mikey.' Oh, I hope not. / There can't be too many people in the world who practice that much. 'Steve Vai? Eric Johnson?' If only I could do it every day ...

Music? How about ... Phil Collins? 'What?! Have you gone insane?!' He has one song I like, Against All Odds. 'Put it on then.' All right.

Guitar? Maybe I should go out instead, and try to squeeze some more enjoyment out of the dying summer. I certainly know what the Aviva Investors mob will be doing. 'Ha! Those losers! They don't have your discipline and work ethic.' They've rejected capitalism, Voice. It doesn't make them losers. Open your mind!!!

...

Oh, I actually love this song. Well done, Phil!