No, no, no! This can't be happening. HBOS seems to have lost a third of its value this morning! What is going on?
I must stay calm. You, my dear readers, must stay calm. Take deep breaths. Imagine a nice spot in the desert on the astral plane in your subconscious. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Keep breathing. We will get through this. WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS.