Wednesday, 30 January 2008

Jerome Kerviel: are there two of him?

Paris is abuzz with stories of there being two Jerome Kerviels. The other one is called Olivier and he used to be connected to BNP Paribas in some way. But that's not all. I've heard that there could be as many as five or six Kerviels, or even seven or eight. How is this possible?

How? Let me tell you. There is a little known mystical process called soul splitting. With this process anyone can split their soul into as many pieces as takes their fancy. They then put a slice of their soul into a ghost-like creature which looks exactly like them. And then they can send this creature out into the world to do their bidding. I suspect this is what Jerome Kerviel has been up to. Very, very clever! It means he can spread the risk.

My dear friend Keith Busby has personal experience of soul splitting, and he says, 'Yeah, I've done that. I created Ron Busby, Dave Busby, Pete Busby and Derek Busby. But you have to be careful because it can backfire. It backfired on me. My creatures decided to band together and give me a pasting. They actually jumped me one night when I was coming out of the pub. But I settled their hash. I liquidated them using a crystal which I had previously charged with the power of Kali. I hope Mr Kerviel knows what he is doing.'